Archive for March 16th, 2009

Appreciating the People That Help Us Grow

Monday, March 16th, 2009

I spoke briefly today with someone that I’m very close with. She was feeling a little down because of a few incidents that happened with her children. Throughout the conversation I quietly understood that she questioned her significance to a small degree. A few things happened that made her feel left out and possibly a little forgotten. After the situation was explained to me I could easily understand where she was coming from. The conversation brought me back to my childhood and the significant roles that so many people played when I was growing up.

Although it was more than 30 years ago there are things that I haven’t forgotten and will never forget. I wanted to relay my story, but I figured it wasn’t the time or place. Instead, I stashed it in the back of my mind and decided to address it tonight in writing.

When I was diagnosed with diabetes my parents had a very hard time dealing with the disease. It brought many new responsibilities to them and created a different lifestyle of sorts. For a while they felt like they had to keep me under their thumbs. I didn’t mind, as I became accustomed to being spoiled. Eventually mom and dad decided to try a vacation by themselves. I would stay with my aunt and uncle. Since my uncle worked my aunt would have the responsibility of looking after me throughout the day. I still remember how afraid she was to give me my insulin injections at first. She thought she was hurting me and always asked if it hurt when she was done. I simply smiled and told her that everything was ok. Although she was nervous I couldn’t feel it as a child, which is a special trait in and of itself. My aunt was the boss and she treated me just like any other kid on the block. I didn’t receive special treatment. I stayed in line and we grew together. Before I knew it that first week that I spent with her without my parents was done. I still remember how comfortable she made me feel and how easy it seemed. As time went by I spent a considerable amount of time with my aunt and I have never forgotten those times. I always refer to the wonderful role models that my parents have been, but I’ve been very fortunate to have many more, such as my aunt.

As I listened to this person talk today I tried to quietly say that sometimes the significance of your actions can carry well beyond where you ever could have imagined. Although you might not see it today, tomorrow or the next day, it will be there and it will come back to you. I believe the sole purpose in our lives is to help each and every person to become a better person. My aunt helped me to become a better person. She made me realize that I would be ok without my parents. I would be safe and she would be there for me if I needed her. The significance of her actions has been on my shoulders ever since. That’s one of the main reasons why I always try to help others, even if they might not deserve it or want it at the time. When I lend my time to someone it might be just that few seconds that could have an everlasting effect.

I’ve realized that in order for me to survive in any relationship I have to help someone become the best person that they can become and they will have to do the same for me. The person will have to allow me to grow and support my growth even if it takes unexpected turns along the way. My bond with my parents is so tight because they have always supported me and encouraged me to be the best person that I can possibly be. All successful relationships have that common theme. If parents help there children to become better people they should know that they have succeeded.

Sometimes we let minor bumps in the road ruffle our feathers for no reason. We have to remember to have enough confidence in our actions to carry us through these times. People often do things without thinking and don’t realize their hasty decisions until it’s too late.

I’ve learned one thing over the years. Many people come to me when they have problems. I think they probably do so because I’m a good listener above all else. I try to offer some positive thoughts to keep the mind where it should be. No matter how bad a situation might seem, there is always at least one positive to be found if you search long enough. If you ignore the negative and build on the positive the road will become clear in front of you. However, if you let the negative swallow you up, you may become angry, irritated or lost in your search for answers. I always remember that everything happens for a reason even if I’m not able to fully understand it.

I will never forget one single person who made me who I am today. There have been some major players other than my parents, but even if someone played a small role I’ll be forever thankful for all of the insight I gained from each and every one of them. As a friend, parent or lover never lose faith that your actions aren’t felt forever. If you show others how to be the best person they can be and help them to achieve this, the significance of your actions will never be forgotten. It might be forgotten for a few days here and there, but not as the receivers grow older. With age comes wisdom. Lately, with every passing day, I’m becoming wiser and wiser. All of the things that I couldn’t make sense out of when I was a child are becoming crystal clear now.

Never question your significance on the life of another human being. If you show your love, display your care and give your help in time of need, you will always be a priority in the thought of whomever you touched, even if it doesn’t seem like it from time to time.